Valentine’s Day tests me every year, regardless of whether or not I actually have a Valentine. It reminds me of all the things I hate about being a girl. It reminds me of how helpless we are against emotions and how impossible it is for our brains to overrule our hearts. Basic concepts of my world such as logic and reason are completely overpowered by… what? The unrelenting need for “the big good.”

What is “the big good,” you ask? It’s something that is born of affection, adoration, respect and enough friendship to drown out all the “little bads” we deal with every day. One of those moments when we actually get those ridiculously girly things we long for but are too proud to admit we do. We want the grand gesture — a thousand yellow daisies or the boombox held high overhead. And yes, I know those are references to a television show and a movie and they’re not “real” but again, today I’m living in a world free from reason. It’s Girl World and it’s like being held captive.

So after all these years, I still need to believe that it’s out there. But where does that leave me? Unworthy? Or just unlucky? And here’s where my brain is able to take back control, if only for a brief moment. You see, I’m not sure every woman deserves “the big good.” But I choose to believe that I do. I just have to inspire it. And I still believe I can…